How Important is a Title in a Relationship?

A title can be defined as an established or recognized right to something. It also can be a ground or basis for a claim. Have you ever found yourself dealing with someone and wondered what are we doing? Or maybe you are dreading having the “so what are we” talk? The conversation of clarity always comes at a some point in a relationship once it reaches a level where the nature of you two needs to be determined. Our question to you is exactly how important is a title to label your relationship status? Let us know your thoughts in the comments but first here is what the duo thinks…

Janae:

I think the importance of the title is determined based on the nature of the relationship. To make it plain and simple, if you’re in a situationship, or have a friend with benefits, then no, you should not be expecting to get the title. On the other hand, if you are building a genuine relationship with a person that you have an emotional attachment to, then yes, i think the title is important. Here’s why. If you have a friend with benefits, or decide to be in a situationship, it is all fun with little to no strings attached, meaning a title should not be expected. The downside to this is, sometimes feelings can develop and eventually someone will want more. Unfortunately, that’s not what you signed up for!

But if two people go into a relationship with the understanding that they are eventually looking to develop something serious, the title is important. A title signifies security and most importantly it shows commitment. So, if you’ve been putting in a lot of time and energy into a person, have developed feelings, and you see a future with them, it only makes sense to eventually make it official. In my opinion, if a guy/girl wants to partake in “boyfriend or girlfriend” activities but doesn’t want to put an actual title on things, that is a clear sign that he/she may not really be interested in being with you and only you.

And although I feel that a title is important when growing in a relationship, I think that it is also important to be sure you are ready for the commitment before taking that next step. No one wants to end up in a failed relationship because they rushed into things.

India:

The old me would definitely give the whole a title isn’t important if you two have an understanding and the infamous “what’s understood doesn’t need to be explained” rant about the topic. But the more mature me thinks that having a title in a relationship is very necessary because you need it to know that you and the other person are on the same page about what you are. Even if it’s dating, friends with benefits, just friends, exclusively dating, boyfriend/girlfriend, f**k buddy, etc. those are all titles. You may not like some or be down with them but it clearly defines what you and the person are to one another. The importance of having a title is to not be confused and out here looking crazy. If one person thinks that y’all are exclusively dating, meaning only seeing each other, while the other person feels as though you are only friends with benefits there is going to be issues and someone is going to end up with their feelings hurt.

To me having a title on the relationship sets boundaries and expectations out of a person. For instance, if you’re talking to someone and you both are just taking it easy you may not really care about little things they do like partying or not hitting you up for a couple of days. Once you slap that boyfriend/girlfriend title on the relationship though, it’s a different type of ball game. You expect more out of them and for them to conduct themselves like they are in a relationship.

These different titles show what stage you are in your relationship and if it is even worth your time and effort. I’m not saying to force the “what are we conversation” but it is good to have a clear understanding with your partner so that both parties can act accordingly.

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Take Two: OG Heartthrobs

It’s Thursday! So that means two things: 1) only one more day to go until the weekend and 2) it’s time to do a second take. If you’re not familiar with this concept let us explain. Every other Thursday we will be featuring a double take on some of our favorite songs, movies, albums, artists, etc. For nostalgia purposes of course. We feel that some of our fav people, places and things need more recognition. Therefore, we are bringing them back for a little more action as a take two. The gag is we can only pick one each!  

Now that we’ve got that out of the way, this week we both chose an OG throwback heartthrob that could use a little bit more spotlight put on them in today’s world. These cuties are the ones who made our hearts stop and skip a beat as a preteen. They were our first loves. Their faces were plastered all over our bedroom walls. Here are the boys that had all of the girls going crazy in the early 2000s.

Ladies, we got y’all.

Be sure to let us know in the comments below if you agree with our picks and also who else were some OG heartthrobs along with your social media. We’ll feature you in another post. Enjoy!

India

Obviouslyyy the one and only OG heartthrob that fits this description is Lil Bow Wow. Duh! This was a no brainer. I’m ashamed to say that no one ever has had me wrapped around their finger the way that Bow Wow had me back in the day…and I never even met this man. From harassing my mom for tickets to the Scream Tours to stalking every issue of Word Up! Magazine for full sized posters to plaster onto my bedroom walls, Bow Wow is the ultimate heartthrob of the early 2000 era. No ifs, ands or buts about it. And how could you forget how epic each and every one of his appearances on 106 and Park were!? Clearly he was Mr. 106 for a reason. Say what you want about who Shad Moss is today but you cannot deny that Lil Bow Wow was a superstar back in the day. He had the hit records, movies, tours and most of all the girls (grown women included). Tbh I lowkey feel like boys even looked up to him with the cornrows, the jerseys, etc. 

I just want to end this with one of Bow’s greatest hits that represented the type of heartthrob he was back in his day.

Janae

When this OG heartthrob first hit the scene in the early 2000s, he was only 12 years young. Singer Sammie captured my heart, and all of the young girls around the world. He was first introduced to us when he released his first hit single “I Like It.” Sammie had a sweet voice and an infectious smile that immediately made him a hit with all the young ladies. In 2006, after a brief hiatus, he dropped his second album featuring his single “You Should Be My Girl.” He took many by surprise upon his return. Sammie had now grown from a cute, sweet little boy, into a handsome, mature young man. He then went on to collab with Soulja Boy on their notable song “Kiss Me Thru the Phone.” If you didn’t know, Sammie continues to make music and perform all around the country. Most recently, he dropped a new EP entitled, 31873.0. When reminiscing about music & entertainment during the 2000s era, it’s a must that we mention Sammie. He definitely goes down as an OG R&B heartthrob.

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#GirlTalk : Are Looks Important?

Let’s be honest, if we all had the option to build our ideal partner I’m sure majority, if not all, of us would create the most attractive person we possibly could. Too bad this is not a fantasy land and we all can not have our own personal Idris Elba. When dating and meeting new people, I think it’s only natural that we tend to notice the physical attraction first. From that initial meeting you decide how far it goes from there. Let’s chat…are looks really that important?

Check out what the duo thinks and vote who you agree with more. Also, don’t forget to leave your opinion in the comment section!

India:

The topic that brings the most shallow thoughts out of me…I apologize in advance. Yes, looks are VERY important to me and here’s why. In my opinion, there is no possible way that I am going to be with someone and take them seriously if I’m not initially attracted to them in any way. Remember ladies, you have to look in this person’s face, go on dates, and kiss them among other things. How are you faking the funk with someone who doesn’t physically do it for you!? This is not to say because I find someone unattractive in my eyes they aren’t attractive in yours. We all have different tastes and preferences in a partner but the way they treat me isn’t going to do it alone. I consider this a bonus feature because first and foremost I have to be attracted to you to even seriously entertain your conversation. Personality, style, mannerisms, life goals, chivalry, etc. all come next. It’s shallow, I know. I may be missing out on some amazing people, I know. But I just cannot build something with someone that I don’t get that “zamnnn zaddy” feeling when I look at him. Everyone wants a catch. We all want our dream guy. We all have certain features that turn us on about the opposite sex. I’ve tried with guys who aren’t typically “my type.” In the end, they were really good guys and they will make some woman very very happy one day but it just could never be me. Chemistry is real and if our physical elements aren’t compatible then that mix isn’t going to work.

Janae:

Looks are not a necessity but definitely appreciated. But, if i am not attracted to you physically, you have to possess other attributes that will attract me to you. As you get older and start looking for something serious, looks can be compromised for with other great qualities such as sense of humor, personality, and intellect. Remember, looks can fade. I think it is important to focus on what’s on the inside and how a person treats you. With that being said, it’s perfectly okay to turn down someone because you are not attracted to him/her in the least bit. At the end of the day, you’re the one who has to lay up and kiss on this person. But, if you happen to meet someone and their not the cutest but have great conversation, why not give it a chance? You never know, you may have just found your soulmate.

 

 

10 Commandments of the Group Chat

Ahhh group chats. One of the most sacred messages in your phone. Friend’s biggest secrets and daily shenanigans at your fingertips. You were added to this message for a reason whether it be for planning a vacation, keeping up with your family, class projects or just for pure entertainment with your friends. We are here to help you learn your role and share the most important things to remember about being a part of a group chat.

Here are the 10 commandments of a group chat. 

Iphone group chat

  1. First and foremost, thou shall let whatever happens in the chat stay in the chat. ALL things discussed in the group chat need to stay IN THE CHAT. If the members in the group wanted others to know they would tell them. Don’t be that person.
  2. Thou shall be active and not lurk. Participation points in the group chat is a big thing. What’s the point of being in the group if you aren’t adding to the convo? P.S. reacting doesn’t equal participation.
  3. Thou shall not reply all if there are unknown numbers in the chat. When Auntie sends out a mass text inviting everybody and their mama to her 50th birthday party DO NOT respond in the message. Text her individually or receive endless “who is this?” messages for the next couple of days. You’ve been warned.
  4. Thou shall mute the conversation or put your whole phone on DND while at work, in class or about to sleep. This commandment is self explanatory. Just do yourself the favor. Do not disturb is your friend.
  5. Thou shall NOT text in the middle of the night if it isn’t an emergency. Some people don’t follow the fourth commandment. Acceptable texting hours are 9am-12am with weekend exceptions. xoxo Management
  6. Thou shall share all deetz or none at all. No half assing your stories in the chat. We need screenshots, names, social media handles, pictures, etc. If you’re not going to share it all then don’t share at all sis.iphone notifications
  7. Thou shall not jump in the chat hours late asking about a topic that has already passed. If you’ve missed part of the convo sorry but scroll up and play catch up.
  8. Thou shall only have all team iPhone or team Androids in a chat, no mixing. Those green bubbles throw the chat off every time. No shade.
  9. Thou shall not judge topics discussed in the chat. If it’s not your thing sis then sit that convo out. Don’t make others feel uncomfortable about things they like discussing. Be open minded. If you can’t talk freely with your friends are y’all even really friends?
  10. Lastly, thou shall not let outsiders read the chat! Be mindful of nosey neighbors and who you leave your phone unlocked around. Protect the chat at all times.

Well there you have it. 10 commandments that shall go for every group chat. If there are any that we missed or you disagree with leave a comment below for us to discuss.

Taraji P. Henson to Star in New Movie ‘Proud Mary’

DMV native Taraji P. Henson is set to star in Screen Gems’ new film ‘Proud Mary’. The actress plays the lead character Mary who is a hit woman working for an organized crime family in Boston. Mary’s life has a change in direction when she comes in contact with a young boy (Jahi Winston, New Edition Story) after a professional hit goes bad.

The film also stars Billy Brown (How To Get Away With Murder), Neal McDonough (Captain America: The First Avenger), Margaret Avery (The Color Purple), Xander Berkeley (The Mentalist) and Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon).

#ProudMaryMovie is set to hit theaters January 12, 2018. Check out the trailer below.

Dear Black People: Classic Black Films You Should Know and Love

Calling a film a classic comes with stipulations. One that I like to use is, if you can play the movie over and over, know the script word for word, laugh at the same old jokes and it still never gets old…issa classic. I introduce to some and present to others classic predominately African American movies that EVERY black person should know/watch for the culture.

Thank me later.

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Love & Basketball – How could I not start the list with this!? Isn’t this every black girl’s favorite movie? Gina Prince-Bythewood wrote this amazing love story. She just gets it! The evolution of Quincy (Omar Epps) and Monica’s (Sanaa Lathan) relationship from adolescents to adults is sure to have you reevaluating your #relationshipgoals

Poetic Justice – Who knew about this movie before Kendrick Lamar and Drake named a song after it? Raise your hand. Justice (Janet Jackson) and Lucky (Tupac Shakur) reluctantly take a road trip together with friends in a mail truck managing to run into several bumps along the way. From blending in at cookouts, taking care of drunk and crazy friends to learning more than they expected about each other this movie should def be in your DVD collection.

Baby Boy – Whether you want to admit it or not this might be one of the most relatable black movie couples there is. It’s the perfect hood love story. Jody (Tyrese Gibson) still lives with his mom, has two kids, two different baby mothers and no job. He cannot seem to find a grasp on life but he is forced to grow up when his mom gets a new boyfriend, Melvin (Ving Rhames). After moving in with his baby moms/girlfriend Yvette (Taraji P. Henson) trouble follows him when her ex Rodney (Snoop Dogg) gets released from jail. Watch as Jody tries to find his footing and grow from a baby boy to a grown man.

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Brown Sugar – For my last love story of this list I had to include this friendship turned secret relationship turned situationship. Sidney (Sanaa Lathan) and Dre (Taye Diggs) share a bond over watching the birth of hip hop on a New York corner as kids. As adults, they both are successful in the music industry and lean on each other as inspiration. Tune in to see how these hip hop heads manage their careers while trying to keep their eyes, hands and lips to themselves. SN: This movie’s soundtrack brought us one of the best songs ever “Erykah Badu – Love of My Life”

Boyz in the Hood – The infamous movie that birthed Ice Cube the actor. If you have never seen this movie WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? Honestly. Tre (Cuba Gooding Jr.) gets sent to live with his father (Laurence Fishburne) in the hood of Los Angeles. There he battles sticking to the straight and narrow that his girlfriend Brandi (Nia Long) and father preaches to him vs. living the street life filled with drugs, gangs and violence like his homie Doughboy (Ice Cube). “Ya’ll want to see a dead body?”

The Wood – Going down memory lane, these three old friends Mike (Omar Epps), Roland (Taye Diggs) and Slim (Richard T. Jones) prepare for Roland’s wedding. Reminiscing on the days they used to run wild in the Inglewood streets the friends find it nostalgic for their bromance and how far they’ve come. When cold feet happens right before the wedding Mike and Slim try to help their boy Roland make it down the aisle. This comedic coming of age movie needs to be added into your collection. No question.

Menace II Society – Not to be confused with the parody made soon after, this film is the ultimate trying to make it out of the trap story. Parallel to many of African American lifestyles back in the 90s, Caine (Tyrin Turner) fresh outta high school is navigating through his gang like upbringing while trying to find his way out of the streets of Los Angeles. With his unpredictable friend O-Dog (Larenz Tate) and a life of crime, Caine realizes moving out of the hood with his girlfriend Ronnie (Jada Pinkett-Smith) isn’t as easy as it sounds.

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Paid In Full – “Everybody eats B!” If your significant other doesn’t know what movie that’s from they’re too young for you. This movie is on Netflix so there is no reason you shouldn’t have seen this one yet. Ace (Wood Harris) works at a dry cleaners in Harlem to keep himself out of the drug game but the streets keep calling him. While delivering clothes, he meets a dealer who convinces him to sell drugs. Ace recruits his two friends Rico (Cam’ron) and Mitch (Mekhi Phifer) to be a part of the business that tests every part of their lives. From loyalty, relationships, family and friendships. The more they get paid the trickier their lives become.

ATL – The modern day classic. This coming of age story of high school seniors Rashad (T.I), New New (Lauren London), and more trying to prosper in the city of Atlanta. The coolest place to be seen on the scene is the infamous skating rink Cascades. From working custodial jobs to pay the bills to pretending to live different lifestyles to be accepted by the masses this movie is relatable to millennials no matter where you’re from.

friday-movie-the-dope-duo

Friday  – Craig (Ice Cube) gets fired on his day off and has the most eventful Friday ever. He and his friend Smokey (Chris Tucker) experience everything from being robbed, owing drug dealers money, blind dates, crazy girlfriends (Paula Jai Parker), crackheads, pastors having affairs, shoot outs and so so much more. Tune into this movie to see how someone’s day can go from 0 to 100. “Bye Felicia!”

Set it Off – Had to end the list with an ensemble cast full of ladies. These four friends Stony (Jada Pinkett-Smith), Cleo (Queen Latifah), Frankie (Vivica A. Fox) and Tisean/Tee Tee (Kimberly Elise) struggle with their finances and personal life so they decide to start robbing banks. With their first attempt being a success they start to get greedy and attract the attention of the police making their sweet escape not go as planned. If you’re looking for a male take on this movie check out Takers.

As usual this list isn’t all inclusive. Let us know below some of your fav classic black films.

Teyana Taylor to Join Season 4 of BET Drama ‘Hit The Floor’

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Get ready Devil’s Nation there is a new devil girl in town! Word is that singer, dancer and all all around entertainer, Teyana Taylor will be joining the squad for the forthcoming season 4 of the original series ‘Hit the Floor.’ The scandalous basketball drama originated on VH1 but is making a move to its Viacom sister station BET. The network promises “more scandal, sex, secrets, intrigue and jaw-dropping dance routines, which captured audiences’ hearts.”

hit the floor cast-the dope duo

The series follows the Los Angeles Devil’s basketball team and it’s Devil Girl’s cheerleaders through a tumultuous series of events that leaves all of the players livelihood at risk. Although there aren’t any details on Teyana’s character yet we already know she got the moves so we can hopefully watch her hit the floor with fellow cast mates Logan Browning, Taylour Paige and more.

Season 4 production is set to start this November.

Source: Deadline